Thursday, September 25, 2008
jacaranda's in bloom
The rains should be here and to herald that, the jacaranda trees have brought forth their abundance of lilac ... or is it purple? What a beautiful sight, jacaranda's in full bloom .... just makes me happy .... you get that silly smile on your face that speaks of joy.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
at what price can you be bought?
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My son (who is almost two) and I were having a bit of a tussle of wills, to put it mildly, about tidying up. He, admittedly, by mistake, threw down a puzzle and I said “please pick it up or the pieces will get lost and Ilana loves that puzzle”. This led to a I-will-cry-till-your-head-explodes-from-the-noise episode that lasted probably 5 minutes but in my half-mad state, felt like an hour. I warned him, got annoyed, yelled, told him I would not let his sister play with him … and then whacked him one and that worked as he just stopped the crying like that, a switch turned off, and he put the stuff away! Uncanny. I consulted a fellow mom and teacher later on and her advice was to find his currency and then buy him off or take it away. I told her he has none, and she said, ‘everyone has a currency, everyone can be bought’. His currency is probably his sister and how do I take her away from him? Besides, I want for my kid to do it because it is the right thing to do, not because there will be no tv, or he will get chocolate!! Why must I buy him off? When will he have a currency and do I really want him to have one? When will it change and how much higher will it go? When he is 18 will I have to sell the family station wagon to buy him off with a new SUV? Is this what I would teach him as a value?
I tell you another story that makes me disappointed in the human race. A friend of mine’s work permit is being delayed. Turns out that her partner of x years threw her out of the joint business and has told immigration vicious lies about her so they investigate her and (the plan being) throw her out of the country! Just for greed, one ‘friend’ would get immigration to investigate someone? I wonder what the price was that ‘bought’ out friendship, that ‘sold’ this lie to some immigration officer in Nyayo house?
My toto and my friend’s story have a common thread. Tenuous thought it may seem.
I have a tendency to create a mountain out of a mole hill but do you not think that we are teaching our children the very ethos that we would have crushed? We are engendering it as a value, unconsciously or consciously. I just want to know where it ends and if it is true ’everyone has a currency, everyone can be bought’. And it need not necessarily be money. I personally can be bought with a box of ferrero kueschen … . Not something to be proud of but it IS that easy. My sister gets bought by a ‘friend’ with a sob story. I can see it is a scam but hey, I am the b@#$% of an older sister so no use me voicing my opinion! My husband is bought with a day of bungee jumping (and incidentally a day sans me …. Hmmm, light dawns on marble head). But think of it, what is your currency and can you be bought?
My son (who is almost two) and I were having a bit of a tussle of wills, to put it mildly, about tidying up. He, admittedly, by mistake, threw down a puzzle and I said “please pick it up or the pieces will get lost and Ilana loves that puzzle”. This led to a I-will-cry-till-your-head-explodes-from-the-noise episode that lasted probably 5 minutes but in my half-mad state, felt like an hour. I warned him, got annoyed, yelled, told him I would not let his sister play with him … and then whacked him one and that worked as he just stopped the crying like that, a switch turned off, and he put the stuff away! Uncanny. I consulted a fellow mom and teacher later on and her advice was to find his currency and then buy him off or take it away. I told her he has none, and she said, ‘everyone has a currency, everyone can be bought’. His currency is probably his sister and how do I take her away from him? Besides, I want for my kid to do it because it is the right thing to do, not because there will be no tv, or he will get chocolate!! Why must I buy him off? When will he have a currency and do I really want him to have one? When will it change and how much higher will it go? When he is 18 will I have to sell the family station wagon to buy him off with a new SUV? Is this what I would teach him as a value?
I tell you another story that makes me disappointed in the human race. A friend of mine’s work permit is being delayed. Turns out that her partner of x years threw her out of the joint business and has told immigration vicious lies about her so they investigate her and (the plan being) throw her out of the country! Just for greed, one ‘friend’ would get immigration to investigate someone? I wonder what the price was that ‘bought’ out friendship, that ‘sold’ this lie to some immigration officer in Nyayo house?
My toto and my friend’s story have a common thread. Tenuous thought it may seem.
I have a tendency to create a mountain out of a mole hill but do you not think that we are teaching our children the very ethos that we would have crushed? We are engendering it as a value, unconsciously or consciously. I just want to know where it ends and if it is true ’everyone has a currency, everyone can be bought’. And it need not necessarily be money. I personally can be bought with a box of ferrero kueschen … . Not something to be proud of but it IS that easy. My sister gets bought by a ‘friend’ with a sob story. I can see it is a scam but hey, I am the b@#$% of an older sister so no use me voicing my opinion! My husband is bought with a day of bungee jumping (and incidentally a day sans me …. Hmmm, light dawns on marble head). But think of it, what is your currency and can you be bought?
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